ramblings: on homoeroticism and black barbershops

barbershops are locations of generally accepted homosocial and homoerotic conversation and behavior. there are scores of men at any given time of day who generally dress nicely to go TO the shop in order to impress their fellow patrons...they know each other. they develop close, intimate relationships with each other all based on weekly visits to the barbershop. many times, dudes IN the barbershop aren't there to get a cut or trim but just for conversation.

now.

the conversation almost DAILY delves into discourse of sexuality generally and homosexuality (or queer sexuality) particularly. there has not been ONE time when i have gone to barbershops where someone's sexuality was not made a spectactle by either 1) praise(e.g., for being a player, for having many hos, or purporting a big dick, etc) or 2) castigation (e.g., not manly enough, too girly, a "faggot", etc).

however, the close proximity of male bodies to other male bodies whilst engaging in this particular discourse of sexuality should be puzzling and is quite contradictory. consider how the barber, often engaging in low conversation with a particular client, has to touch the face, the neck, the ears...these are erogenous zones, to be sure. also consider how the barber has to lean his body in to the body of the client. the three feet of personal space is invaded in the client-barber context...

but it is also invaded in the client-client context. they have to sit on benches or chairs directly next to each other. knees inadvertently touch. there are pats on back (e.g., "atta-boy!", etc)...

yet the most inciting conversation ever to be had in a barbershop is that of sexuality. either the praise for overt heterosexuality or the disdain for homosexuality; it is still the ideas of sex that proliferate daily...

and it makes dicks hard...

i am interviewing a bunch of black gay folks re: their relation to black churches. i read two homophobic passages from sermons to them and ask them how it makes them feel. i have often heard that, while it seems to be castigatory on the one hand, that it is often a turn on...it often HEIGHTENS ones awareness of their own sexuality and causes them to want to engage in sexual activities that are seemingly "off limits" allthemore.

i conceive of the black barbershop as a sacred AND safe space for men to purport heterosexuality all while devling deeply yet covertly into homoerotic/homosocial behavior patently...what makes this space different from a football or basketball lockeroom (for me) is that the barbershop is a public space that is literally put on display for everyone to walk past, nod, peer into and calls for outsiders to participate...

yet, there is this sexual discourse of sexuality that permeates the walls...

the day that i openly declared that i was gay without shame was the single most hurtful day to the men in the barbershop. not because i was gay but because i *SAID* i was gay and somehow, all of their sexualities were called to the fore...they got scared...they dismissed me in unbelief. they stopped speaking to me. they looked away from me because *THEY* were shamed through what *i* said...

so yeah...the black barbershop is a space that begs to be understood with its more sexual undertones...